At the Foot of the Stairs

In the interest of extending an olive branch, I decided to remove a post I wrote earlier this week. 

Eric at work told Whitney, "Jen seems so happy. She is smiling so much more." Today my friend Will said to me, "You look younger every time I see you." I said, "This is what Jen in love looks like." I remarked to someone recently that we had been dating almost two weeks, and she seemed visibly surprised that we had been publicly canoodling in the balcony of Baldwin Hall at a recent Lyceum event. I suppose it might seem sudden from the outside. But I have dated a lot since my second marriage ended. And then I stopped dating for a long time. So, I have been very, very single for two years, and completely date-free/celibate for 11 months of that time. I've known for a very long time that unless I met someone with whom I could have at least as interesting conversations as I have with my small circle of friends, it wasn't going to have long-term potential. Most of those friends have openly said to me that I was never going to find what I want...

"How on earth did you meet this guy?" my friend Lynn Carter asked me just now. I said, "It's a cute story and I am going to blog about it. :-) " This guy is Darren Pinkerton. He has been encouraging me to start blogging again. "You could even write about our relationship if you wanted to, if you need material." It is true that he is most of the material I have lately. Otherwise, my life for the past eleven months has pretty much been Criminal Minds, JC Penney, and teaching one creative writing class. I have had two online dating profiles for awhile now. Since 2012. I have deactivated them at times and reactivated them. But I have not dated, until now, since New Year's. And no, it is not because I have not been asked. I was just tired of not meeting anyone of substance who actually wanted to know ME and wanted to spend time with me outside of the sack. So, I just didn't date. And it was great. To boot, my doctor upped my Prozac in the wi...

Online dating requires strict vigilance. It is time-consuming, disappointing, frustrating, and maddening. Occasionally, it's worth it. But really, being on dating sites at this point is more a form of entertainment than anything else. I keep my profiles active just in case. Just in case of what, I'm not sure because I don't think the man of my dreams is going to pluck me from a dating site so we can live happily ever after. But considering that I rarely go anywhere but my house, my mom's house, the grocery store, work, and work, the chances of my meeting a new person are fairly slim. So, every once in awhile, someone who isn't a complete creep will send me a message and ask if we can email or chat and get to know each other. Sometimes I am willing to do this, sometimes not. It's based on a number of factors. Does this person have a picture up? Do they sound intelligent in their profile? Did they mention anything specific to me in their message, not just send ...

Happy New Year, rah rah rah. I know I fell off the blogging planet very suddenly, but things just conspired in such a way that I just couldn't blog for awhile. Even though I am a fan of blogging honestly and openly about a number of topics, there are just times when you can't write about what is going on. At least not publicly, and if that is the case, I avoid putting thoughts to paper altogether. I used to spend a lot of time deliberating about whether or not there are some things one can't blog about, either because it's too painful, too fresh, too invasive of someone else's privacy. As an "artist," I wondered about integrity and firmly believed that self-censure was to be avoided. Now that I am an "adult," I realize that my youthful attitude was based on the fact that nothing of consequence or importance had happened to me yet when I thought that. I've now changed my mind. So, anyway. Back. Still here. But I'm not even sure why I ...