This Morning was a protracted continuation of last night. I had a hard time getting to sleep last night, despite the Hy-Vee knock off brand of Ny-Quil, and so I slept in this morning (that needs to STOP) and when I got up this morning, I coughed up all kinds of nifty things, none of which were green, so here I am at work.
Started the tub, said good morning to Sam in the bathroom, and woke up the younger two.
Christian: "So, are dementors real?"
Tommy (with covers over head): "I am NOT going to school!"
Go into kitchen to make coffee, and Christian appears very quickly.
Christian: "So, when Harry Potter sees the Grim at the Quidditch Game, that means he is going to die in two seconds?"
Me: "Well, did he die?"
Christian: "No, but the Grim means he is ABOUT to die, right?"
Me: "Well, that's just the opinion of that one teacher. But she just thinks it's a Grim, when it's really Serius Black, because he is an animagus. That means he can turn himself into the dog."
Christian: "How did Serius Black survive all those years in prison without food and water?"
Me: "Well, even when you're in prison, you still get food and water."
Christian: "Who brought Serius Black the food and water?"
Me: "I don't know. Tommy get UP. Maybe a guard did."
Christian: "Maybe it was one of the dementors."
Sam: "Can I have a quesadilla for breakfast?"
Me: "Sure. Can you go make it? Tommy, we need to do your homework."
Christian: "Why did Hagrid tell them they couldn't be seen?"
Me: "Because he didn't want Dumbledore to know they were going to see Buckbeak get killed. Come on, Tommy, let's read your books. Christian, you need to get dressed."
Christian: "Or maybe it was because it was about to get dark and the dementors would get them."
Sam: "It wasn't dark yet."
Me: "But it was going to get dark. Okay, Christian, you get dressed, and Tommy, you need to read your book to me."
[Tommy stumbles over a word and SHOUTS in outrage, and Mommy yells at Tommy, Tommy cries, Mommy consoles, they finish the book and go get hot cocoa and breakfast.]
Christian: "What is a specter?"
Me: "A ghost?"
Christian: "So, maybe the Grim is really a specter?"
Me: "Well, except it isn't really a Grim. It's really Serius Black because he can turn himself into a dog."
Christian: "I bet, what's that Professor who can turn into a werewolf?"
Christian: "I bet the werewolf could beat one of those dementors."
Christian: "Why does Snape frighten all?"
Me: "Well, because he is just kind of a mean guy."
Christian: "And maybe because he makes them do a lot of hard work."
And so on and so on and so on.
This morning, I need cigarettes and beer.
Raise your hand if you think Mommy actually yelled at Tommy because she wanted to yell at Christian, and raise your hand if you agree that this is not conducive to Tommy wanting to learn how to read?